Let's be honest; she was already the reining queen of paleo hipsters. With her artsy lifestyle blog photographing repugnant but trendy "paleo" chow, her trust fund sponsored european vacay, relocating to hipster mecca Brooklyn (previously only home to "Guidos" and various other ethnic stereotypes), and her mind boggling certainty/arrogance regarding every single subject ever... was there ever really ever any competition? McEwen has this hipster olympics thing on lock.
There is a core driving need in spoiled wealthy youth to chip through the vanilla crust of their wantless lives and pretend to live on the "fringe"... rough + slum it, and/or return back to earth... without ever leaving the security of their dad's amex card behind, of course. Paleo catches many loons in its net, but this type of butterfly is a Melissa McEwen: your standard american trust fund hipster. They usually become uber liberal vegans, but I'm told cavesters are the new vegan, duh (see above).
A picture speaks a thousand words. For your entertainment + education I present a taxonomy of the american hipster:
The reason the phrase "hipster or homeless" exists, is because hipsters are generally spoiled, wealthy brats who have a quarter life crisis in college, and much like young Siddhartha did, decide to spend the rest of their days cosplaying like the very down and out. When one has never had to want for anything from the moment they were shat out into the world, it creates this paradoxical desire to go on "deprivation vacations"... it involves such superficial sacrifices such as dressing like a skid row addict, for example, or, living in a developing neighborhood shithole (but, only with your other wealthy / cool /artist hipster friends of course, lol, not with REAL poor people who have no choice in the matter, that is totally not trendy!!!)
However, McEwen really just upped the hipster bravado a notch never seen before by human kind. It practically borders on psychosis with her recent escapade here. BITCH FORAGED BATHROOM MOLD, AND ATES IT. ATES IT! McEwen doesn't just wage war on middle aged anarchists, but she wages war on bathroom molds, too.
I mean, eating WTF parts of bacon animals and hamburger animals is one thing. Cavesters have been doing that for years, it's old hat by now. I guess, like a sex offender, you keep having to up the ante to maintain the original thrill garnered by initiating the cavester cult. Eventually you find yourself scraping mold off of your bathroom floor, "foraging" for tomorrows dinner.
I mean, what the hell. Eating mildew, fucking what?
This disorder needs zyprexa stat. PUT THIS IN THE DSM V.
"Hipster Affect Disorder, recurrent, most recent episode "Paleo", Severe: YUO BECOME SO TRENDY YOU EAT THE MILDEW FROM UR SHOWER FROM YOUR BROOKLYN SLUM-PARTMENT WHILE TELLING EVERYONE YUO ARE A DOWN TO EARTH CAVE MOMMA"
In other news, McEwen is so proud of her successful "foraging" attempt she is now going around the interweb dismissing everyone's work WHO HAS NOT YET FORAGED FROM TEH BATHROOM TOILET.
Guyenet follows suit like a good yesman with his shrill, bitchy, nasally whine as per usual:
"I don't know where to start with all the problems in the first link. It's written in a style that suggests academic rigor but most of the points are "supported" by 1) wild extrapolation from very limited data, and 2) pure speculation."
HAHA I think the pot just called the kettle obesity researcher, for real.
Lets be honest, the real reason Guyenet is SOMAD is because Anna is part of our low carb coven here where he has traditionally been roundly mocked on the daily. Plus friends with his archiest nemesis, Peter D/Hyperlipid. Yea, so he's just butthurt/mad/etc.
McEwen's RAGE distills to yet another new blog shoots ahead of her in popularity, meanwhile huntgatherlove remains the definition of no1curr, to infinity and beyond.
"Format is so bad" haha, scaaaathing criticism, and the lolzy part of all is this is pretty much the polar opposite of reality so it shows their desperation. No footnotes? I've been using footnotes since I STARTED my website, bitch! Anna, really, just pack your shit up and go home.
But you know, H8rs gonna H8 anyway, so.
In closing, I would like to share this comic I made to describe the fancy paleo hipster dinner McEwen threw her friends with her athlete's foot bathroom fungus: